Two Peace Corps Volunteers

Swear In

Hello Everyone!

Wow. Here we are. I can hardly believe it, but I have actually sworn in as a Peace Corps Volunteer! Who let that happen? On one hand I can see how I have worked so hard to get here, overcome so much, grown so much, and on the other hand it feels like the time has flown by, and I’ve really just shown up for classes and wondered what was for lunch. I guess that’s typical.

Yesterday my host family had an “Au Revoir dinner” for me, which strongly resembled Ornelia’s birthday. We had shishkabobs (a first for me in a Benin) and some strange starchy cakes, that might be called Ablo. The kids got soda and us ‘adults’ had beer. I was relieved that there wasn’t a cake. I didn’t really want a big fuss, and honestly I wasn’t ready for the good bye dinner and I didn’t have any presents ready for them! They gave me a dress/poncho which is apparently traditional for the area Papa is from, near Bohicon. It’s a little quirkier than most of the stuff they usually wear, but I’m all the happier to receive it. There’s a lizard embroidered on the front. (I did give them presents today, but I will get to that).

When I was eating dinner, I thought about all that had happened in my time with the host family. I thought about my first dinner, nervously trying to make conversation (only to find out later that conversation at the dinner table is generally considered rude). I thought about the morning when my little host sister Cena had to show me how to open the can of Nescafe. Then I thought about everything after that. I went to a party for a first communion and a party for a wedding. Cena lost a tooth, Jerro threw up on the floor one time, Ornelia had malaria for a little less than a week in there, Ornelia had a birthday, a baby came and visited regularly, a grandma visited, cousins came and left. We ate, we drank, we laughed, we watched soap operas. I can’t done being greatful to this family for opening their home to me. They have been so patient and loving. When I went to the couturier, or seamstress one time with my host mama, another mama talked with us there, when she found out who was hosting me she said I had a great host mama, “elle est gentile avec tout la monde” ‘she is kind to everyone’. That certainly is true and it stuck with me because of it.

Today we had the Swear In Ceremony. My dress was fabulous. The buses were slow. The Ambassador’s house is so mice and air conditioned, though the ceremony was outside. It took a long time to start. We had to wait for honorable invitees to arrive. The speeches were good and I was pleased with how well I could generally follow the French. As per tradition, trainee/volunteers also gave short speeches in Fon, Barbi, and Wama, which some have been studying since the beginning of July. Swearing in was a pretty quick process, and I had one of those “I don’t feel any different” moments. I think the realization comes a little more slowly. Still, we were all happy and excited. Little by little I am feeling ready to get to my post and get to work.

In the afternoon we got to shop in Cotonou a bit. I went to Erevans; the big, overpriced superstore where you can buy almost anything western. I had fun and spent a little too much money. Among the conquests was SPF 50 sunscreen, a great pillow, two sented candles, chopsticks, and cinnamon. I think I kept myself in check essentially. After that I went to a seed store and spent way too much money on papaya seeds. Those had better work out!

The drive back to Porto Novo was riddled with traffic and when we got back it was dark. The buses dropped us off at Songhai and we all said our goodbyes, or at least ‘see you later’s. It was a sad moment. A lot of little things have given me flash backs to leaving for the Peace Corps. This is partially encouraging, because that transition went well, all things considered. The dinner with my host family made me remember saliently my last dinner with my family, featuring surprise lobsters. Planning the trip to Erevans’ made me think of my last trip to Home depot, when it was hotter in Boston than in Benin and I wanted a knife sharpened (no correlation, I swear!). Saying goodbye just reminds me how great the people in my life are.

When I got back to my host family we had a fairly low key dinner. I wore my new poncho dress and gave them some small gifts from Erevans and some of the beads and string my mom sent for the kids. After dinner I watched the Indian soap opera Sheree for the last time (for better or worse). I said good night to my host parents and started down the hallway to go to my room. Cena met me in the hallway. I don’t think she said anything, I think she just stopped and looked up at me. I smiled and held out my hand and she took it. I told her I would come back for her birthday in January. She just sort of smiled and shuffled her feet. And then she kept holding my hand, standing there for probably ten minutes. I just let her. I was so touched and didn’t know what else to do. Her two younger brothers started joking around and pushing each other or just laughing. Cena and I laughed to, but we kept hanging on to each others hands. Finally Ornelia came by and told Cena that I needed to pack and go to bed. I asked Cena if she would wake up early to say good bye. She said yes, so I told her for now it wasn’t goodbye, just goodnight. The whole encounter was so wonderful and so heart breaking. I guess you never can fully know what you mean to people. I didn’t want to let go of her hand, but I guess it had to happen eventually.

I don’t often find myself saying that events have changed me, or made me grow measurably. I hope I haven’t lost anything that I was when I left Boston, I don’t think I have. However, I feel like I have surprised myself and stretched myself through all the adjustments that have been made so far. I can negotiate a fair price for a motorcycle taxi ride to my destination in a culturally appropriate way. I lived for two weeks in two cement rooms overrun with spiders. I’ve gotten to know and love a family that was once strangers. I have come to believe that I can succeed in my own apartment in rural, upcountry, Benin. (I sometimes think of the quote from Tim Burton’s Alica in Wonderland, ‘Sometimes I think of five impossible things before breakfast’).

Gratefulness is what I keep coming back to, and it is the most fitting. I feel so lucky to get to encounter these crazy challenges, and I feel grateful to share them with you.

On that note, sadly, this will be my last post from Porto Novo. Tomorrow morning (bright and early) I am heading up to Founougo. I have dreams of being able to update the blog weekly, but we will see what works out. In the mean time I think it will take at least a month to get some sort of routine figured out. I expect to be in touch with my parents, if you have any pressing comments or questions.

Thanks for sharing this journey with me. I look forward to seeing where it leads!

With love,

Lauren

Pictures!

The first two pictures are of Founougo. Specifically, they are of he sprawling mint that covers the ground this time of year around the home of the Director of one of the primary schools, where I stayed for the two week visit. I can’t exactly explain why, but Founougo has something strangely beautiful about it in my opinion. I hope you agree.

The next picture is of the crowded bush taxi that 8 of us trainees rented out for the long drive from Kandi to Cotonou.

The next picture is me, sporting a scarf, in the busch taxi. Yes I look crazy and also super Beninese, obviously, but the scarf is actually also very practical up north. In hot sunny weather it provides some light weight shade. In chilly weather it cuts the cold. On sandy windy taxi rides, it keeps hair out of your face, significantly decreasing wind burn!

The next picture is of me in my second Beninese-made dress. My host mama picked out the fabric. It’s actually a little more subdued compared to most Beninese fabrics, if you can believe that. I chose a more modern Beninese style for this dress, and I’m pretty happy with how it came out!

The next picture is of my host sister Cena, age 9 and number 2 out of 4. She is the joker in the family, and I had to include this picture just to depict that a little.

And the last picture is the three youngest of my four host siblings. From left to right, it’s Jerro (possibly spelled Gerard), Vyani, and Cena. Vyani looks so pleased. They are all really great kids.

Today I was given a powerful gift

Today, as part of our administrative work to finish training, each EA trainee had a meeting with Giselle, our revered Training Manager, and Salomon, our Program Manager. We got to talk a little about how we felt the training has gone, and if we felt ready to make a two year commitment to the Peace Corps. We were surprised that Gisele and Salomon also had criteria on which they had accessed each of us, based on he work we’ve turned in, our behavior in and out of class, and responses from our host families. I am happy to get to tell you that I was surprised by what a positive review I got! Before we even really got started, Salomon said, “Lauren est toujours content.” ‘Lauren is always happy’. They said that They had observed my morale being consistently high, and that I was always willing to work and participate in the lessons. They said that my host family said that I had spent a lot of time with them and had shared a lot between American and Beninese culture.

It really meant a lot to me to hear those things. As you probably know if you have been reading the blog, I have been pretty happy with how training has gone. Still, there are things that I have questioned about myself. Life with the host family is a great example. I really pushed myself to hang out in the living room where they all work and hang out, even when I might have been more comfortable in my room. I really tried to share how I was feeling, and what my American perspective was, even when it seemed to take a long time to explain. Despite these things I have sometimes worried that I didn’t push hard enough to become involved with the household chores or things like that. Knowing that the family has felt like I have been open and available, and a real part of the family is so affirming.

I really appreciated getting that affirmation at this time. As I have mentioned, I have some apprehension about the adjustment of moving to Founougo. Knowing that I have been doing it right here in Porto Novo, through all the challenges and uncertainty of these first months, makes me see that I have what it takes to make it work.

And in fact, Salomon said just that. He said that he saw in my paperwork that I have some anxiety about moving to post. He said that, especially in light of the above, he believed that I have the skills necessary to be successful. He reminded me that he and the Assisstant Program Manager, Gbaguidi, are here for me. He did specifically say that Founougo might seem far, but it’s not far away for the Peace Corps and if necessary he for Gbaguidi could always visit. And then he said they chose me for this post because “tu es fort” ‘you are strong’. Hearing that from Salomon was like being given a sword as a present. I felt complimented and also empowered.

I hope I’m not bragging by sharing these things. Instead I just really wanted to get to share my successes with you guys. It hasn’t been easy leaving home and friends and family, adjusting to new food and new germs, speaking a second (and pieces of a third) language, and navigating the uncertainty of cultural differences. Hearing that someone thinks I’m doin’ it right is so affirming as I move forward into this next phase.

Speaking of the next phase, a couple words on that. When I move to post, internet access is going to become a mush more limited commodity than it is here in posh Porto Novo. I should be able to travel about an hour to a cyber café, or three hours to a Peace Corps base that has wi-fi. That being said, I am not going to be able to update the blog as frequently. In the first three months, and especially the first month, I think it would be wise if we all kept the expectations very low. I will have cellphone reception, and therefore will be staying in regular contact with my Mom and Dad. I have talked with them about the possibility of them posting on the blog on my behalf. We will see if that is necessary, playing it all by ear.

Thanks so much for reading and sharing in this adventure so far with me. I’m feeling very luck.

With love,

Lauren

Last week of training!

**I wrote this on Monday September 10th**

Hi Everyone,

I can not believe that it is the last week of training! When I thought about September back when I first got here it seemed like such a far off dream to be actually finishing training. It feels like I’ve been in Benin for a long time, but training has gone by fast. It seems like every week has gone by faster than the last.

I hope and suspect that service at post is going to be the same way. Today we had a session about plans and expectations for the first week. I was very encouraged that the head of Environmental Action, Salomon, said that one of the priorities of the first week is to make your house “friendly”; make it somewhere you are happy to be. It’s good to know that he knows that those measures of comfort are important. Of course, there is some work to be done in the first few months, and we talked about that too. I hope to spend some time working making modified mudstoves with people, and also working with them in their gardens and fields. I will also be getting to know people who work in the school system and possibly start developing some lesson plans there. In general, the first three months are all about getting to know the needs and the resources of the community.

Salomon also said something else interesting that really stuck with me. He said that if you really stay at your post the first three months, (and don’t travel around lots to other cities and friends), if you stick it out, you will ask to extend for a third year. I think it makes sense that if you can really just invest in finding ways to cope with stress, finding people you can talk to, finding meaningful work right in your village, then the rest is all details. From that perspective, I can see how so many volunteers say that training is the hardest part of service, and The first three months at post are often considered the best part of service. Life stops being about guessing at future contingencies, and starts really being about, “here I am, how can I make this work.” It’s an encouraging idea.

As for logistics of the near future, Swear In is this Friday! Today was our last day of technical training. Tomorrow through Thursday we will have Administrative Sessions, and some Language tests. Friday morning we will all be shuttled to Cotonou where we will have the Swear In Ceremony at the US Embassadors house, in the presence of our host families among other people. In the afternoon we will have a little time to shop in Cotonou. Saturday morning we load up our respective taxis and head to post!

I have already started packing things up a little. It’s intimidating to try to get everything together again. I am encouraged to think that (Lord willing) I won’t be needing to up and move everything again for another two years. What a crazy idea that is!

Exciting times. Thanks for reading,

Love,

Lauren

Hi Everyone!

I am just putting up a quick post to let you know that the weird fatigue-sick-y-ness that I was feeling the day before yesterday seems to have blown over. Hooray for rest and lots of water. I really believe in jumping on these things at the first signs of real trouble, and so far that seems to have done the trick in this case. I’m very grateful. Sickness might be part of the experience, but I am happy to keep that to a minimum.

 Yesterday was the birthday of another EA trainee, Clinton. I did the math and with 64 trainees, we probably have 5 birthdays a month. Plenty of reasons to all get together after class. Clinton made himself a ‘Blizzard’ with a fanmilk ice cream-in-a-bag, gram crackers, chocolate, and peanut butter. I thought that was pretty ingenious. He seemed to be pretty pleased with it too.

That’s all I’ve got time for at the moment. Thinking of you all back east. Thanks for reading!

With love,

Lauren

second to last week of training!

Hello everyone,

Only a few passing pieces of news for today. Yesterday we learned how to make mudstoves, which are essentially free to make and much more fuel and smoke efficient than many of the popular models. All the practical application is really encouraging. The current volunteer who is working with usthis week, Nora, said that when she was introducing herself to people in village she would say, “and I also know how to make mudstoves. Would you like me to make one for you?” and that was how she first got to hang out with people.

After class yesterday Heidi and I went to the couturier, or seamstress. It’s a tradition in Peace Corps Benin for each sector to pick out one pattern of fabric, and then everyone gets an outfit made in that fabric for Swear-In. Heidi and I both chose fairly western designs for our dresses, so hopefully they will come out ok. Western styles can be more complicated and confusing for couturiers.

Today I actually was feeling kind of sick, and went home early. I just feel very tired and a little nauseaus. If symptoms continue tomorrow, I will call the doctor. It could possibly be a side effect, but just feeling a little sick and tired does kind of underline any homesickness I am feeling. I want to work on savoring memories when they hit me, instead of feeling sad that I can’t do those things right now.  I won’t say that I *haven’t* been daydreaming about grandma’s cooking, and family vacations, and video games with friends. Still I try to remind myself there are things here that I will miss when that time comes. All things in moderation, preferably with some good sleep!

Thanks for reading,

With love,

Lauren

weekend talent show

Hello everyone,

It’s been a very successful Saturday here in Benin by all accounts. In the morning we learned about fuel efficient mud stoves, which we will practice building next week. The volunteer I am replacing actually did a lot of work teaching people how to build and use them. I am sure that I will still wind up teaching a few people how to build and maintain mud stoves, but a lot of ground has been covered there already. I was encouraged to hear that /maintaining/ them is actually a topic that doesn’t get covered very much. I might have a unique opportunity to follow up with people and really re-affirm effective long term use.

After that I had Bariba class (local language) with a tutor. He’s a young guy, and he’s kind of new to teaching, but he is enthusiastic about the material, and I am really glad to get some extra time in with Bariba before getting back to my post.

In the afternoon we had a talent show that some of the other volunteers organized. Over all it was a pretty impressive event. Lots of surprisingly good singing and guitar playing, a quality improve sketch, some cooking, some water balancing, you know, all the basics. I had dreams of doing a little bit of colorguard, but it wasn’t exactly easy to jury rig a weighted flag, so sadly that didn’t happen. It was really fun to watch the show though.

In the afternoon I got to make talli talli with my host mama. Talli talli is easy-to-make fried banana dough balls, perfect for your almost too ripe bananas. This was very exciting because I haven’t gotten to cook much here. We chatted a little about Swear-In. It was generally a calm, sociable evening.

We are all starting to think more and more about the move to post.  I hope making friends is easily there! I’ve started making a list of things that I would like to pick up here in the south where they are cheaper. We will see how that goes. Little by little, petit-a-petit!

That’s about it for now. Thanks for reading.

With Love,

Lauren